Friday, May 28, 2010

EC

Okay I admit it, the first time I ever heard about a 2-day-old baby using a potty instead of a diaper, I thought it was a load of crap (pardon the pun).  I had never heard of such a thing and had never known anyone who did elimination communication or was diaper-free.  I was intrigued so I looked it up and thought well I work so I'll never have time for that.  Once we decided for DH to become a SAHD, I knew he would never go for it.  Who potty trains a child that can't even walk?

Okay then I met 'T' at a babywearers meeting and she kinda explained it to me.  I also looked it up on TheBabyWearer.com and found some good advice.  I think the number one thing I found out is that it is not all or nothing.  I can part-time EC.  I can use a diaper as a safeguard and just take it off when I think Audrey needs to go to the bathroom.  In other words, you can EC as much as you can fit in.

So that bit of info made me brave.  I can do this.  Audrey is smart.  I'm smart.  Peeing is natural and keeping your pee on you is not.  Besides I hate using disposable diapers and again DH is not going for cloth.  One day I just decided to see what Audrey would do.  I took her diaper off and I put her on the potty.  I thought she needed to go but nothing.  So I went back to the changing table about to put on a diaper and feeling a little defeated and then I got a bright idea to hold her over the trashcan.  After all she has seen us put dirty diapers in the trashcan all of her life, maybe she thinks we peed in the trashcan.  So I held her over the trashcan and started saying 'PSSSSSSS' and she peed!  My first successful attempt to ED, not in the toilet but I got the trashcan.  I was able to have her do it once more and then last night was a break thur, she peed on the potty!  We sat there for a few minutes so she could get more comfortable and I was making my "PSSSS" sound and she peed.  I gave her lots of praise and kisses and announced it on Facebook, like a good mommy.

So I'm working on switching to cloth diapers for nighttime, DH is not convinced, and ECing when I'm with her, DH is not going to try.  I've been told Baby Bjorn makes a great baby potty and for only $20 or so from Amazon, I think it's worth the money.  Besides we'll need it once we do "potty train."  So that's my adventure into EC for now. 

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Breastfeeding & Pumping - Making it work

First let me say that I know I am very lucky to work in education where the majority of the workforce is women and therefore tends to be more breastfeeding/pumping friendly than most industries.  I am also very lucky to have a wonderful principal and assistant principal who are both super supportive so I can always feel free to talk to them about issues and who to resolve them.  I am also a librarian at the high school level so I have an incredible amount of freedom with my schedule.  Okay that's my disclaimer.

So the purpose of today's blog is how I make breastfeeding & pumping at work work.  I hear that is the number one reason that mom's wean once they return to work, don't have time to do it anymore.  While it was scary to pump at work at first, now I don't even think about it.  Put up sign, close and lock door, boobs out, pump on, time for facebook!

Here is my typical (well as typical as a day with a 5-month-old gets) workday schedule:

6am - Wake up, bathroom, put on pot of hot water and pump (I use the hot water to wash my pump parts.  I think it saves time over running the water until it gets hot.)
6:30am - get dressed, clean pump, pack lunch
6:50am - get baby up, change diaper, dress her (DH also gets up and follows his routine)
7am or so-Drive to work (we only have one car so DH drives me in, I also live about 35 mins away from my job) baby naps on the drive
7:45 am - Arrive at work
9:30 am - Pump
12:30 pm - Pump and have lunch
3:45 pm - go home
4:20 pm - Nurse Audrey
8pm - Nurse Audrey
Between 9 - 10pm - Get ready go to bed (shower, brush teeth, change baby's diaper, you know the night stuff)
We co-sleep/bedshare so I nurse Audrey through out the night, she usually eats to go to sleep (9:30 or so), eats again around 1 am and then again at 5am or so.  Each night is a little different.

I am a pretty successful pumper.  I average about 10 oz a day (at work) and Audrey will usually only eat about 10 oz so I'm pretty set there.  But I also pump and leave a fresh bottle each morning (average 4oz) so I do usually end up freezing about 20 oz a week.  My freezer currently has over 100 oz of breastmilk so if I couldn't pump or miss a session I would still be okay for the next day (this has happened so even with all of my flexibility, I don't always get my pumping in). 

I use to pump 3 times at work but Audrey preferring to nurse rather than take the bottle, I found it better to drop the 3pm pumping and just nurse as soon as I got home.  On days I know I won't see Audrey until after 5pm I go ahead and do the 3pm pump.

So that's my day in a nutshell.  Not perfect but it works.  Hope that provides some help in the making it work while working.

Oh, I have a Medela Pump'N Style Advance, use the Playtex drop-in system milk collecting set, and have a hands-free pumping bra.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

2 teeth

Audrey now has 2 teeth! The last two weekends, she has been fussy followed by a brand new tooth on Monday. These little teeth are sharp! They hurt when she bites down on your finger. They hurt when she bites down on the boobies.

I find myself getting all sentimental. She is growing so fast. It hardly seems possible that she already has teeth. I feel like I just found out I was going to have a baby and now she has teeth! It is also exciting watching her grow. She's about 17 pounds and 25 inches tall. She looks like her daddy with just a hint of me thrown in. She is the most beautiful shade of caramel and it looks like she is going to have her Abulita's hair, curly, thick, and just a little coarse. All in all I would say I have a real beauty on my hands.

She also has a strong personality. She likes to be tickled. She loves music videos. She wants the doggies to play with her but once she's done she lets them know it. She is also strong for a baby. You can actually see her 6-pack abs! The doctor commented that she must be strong since she held her head off the table for most of her appointment.

I am amazed by her. I'm truly humbled that God has given me this awesome task. I know my journey into motherhood is still in the beginning stages. I have a lifetime of learning still to do. But for now, I'll enjoy those 2 little teeth. Boobs heal so I'll try not to focus on the new found pain. I'll just wait for each new tooth and remember fondly when she didn't have any. Man, people were not joking when they said they grow up so quickly.

Monday, May 17, 2010

Some people suck

at reading other people. I'm a sucky person reader. Seriously, Jeffery Dahmer would have been my best friend. I would be the person on tv, "Like he seemed really nice. Quiet but nice. We would talk and he seemed normal. I guess you just never know." Dude I never know!

DH would say I collect crazies. I say I just like to talk to people. I very rarely meet a person I don't like. I trust everyone. I'm surprized I'm not dead yet. I know that there are people in this world that are out to hurt others but I guess I just believe that God will keep them away.

I don't really have a problem with my lack of character judgement. Like I said I just trust God is putting people into my life for whatever reason and go with the flow. But I'm beginning to wonder if this is a good trait to pass on to Audrey. DH is a good judge of character. He can always tell when someone is about to turn on me; he knows how a friendship will end; he tries to keep the bad people out of my life. So I hope that Audrey takes on some of his skills. I don't want anyone to hurt my Audrey but DH is also mistrustful of just about everyone and I'm not sure that is good for Audrey either. I don't want her to think that everyone is out to get her. I don't think everyone is out to get people. So how do I help strike the right balance? Teach her to trust people but keep her safe. Teach her to be cautions without teaching her to be afraid of everyone.

I'm a horrible judge of character. Some people just suck at reading other's intentions. All the way back to middle school, I've had trouble picking friends. I have one best friend that dates back to 7th grade, I think she's another reason I've made it so far. She tended to keep the bad folks out of my life too. I think she has the right balance. She has lots of friends but knows how to keep the "crazies" out of her life. Maybe with the move back to Texas, Miss Audrey will have a good model afterall.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Do you need a man?

I was reading a blog this morning that really pointed out the difficulties for breastfeeding mothers. This blog focused on one mother's struggle in Iowa. It was sad to hear that a woman was harassed for breastfeeding her 5-week old at the mall. The mall was bad enough but once the media got a hold of the story the comments from the public were horrible and people were harassing her.

That was all really bad stuff but then I got to talking to my husband and I said something I never would have thought I would have said. "I bet if her husband was with her, no one would have said anything." Which got me to thinking, do you really need a man to protect you if you are breastfeeding?

I'm not usually one of those I need a man to survive sort of woman. I've gone clubbing by myself. I'm the main bread winner in the family. I can survive on my own. Now that I'm a mother I find myself needing a man, well my man. I have so much respect for women who do this on their own, being a married mother with good backup is hard, I can't even image the stress for single mothers!

When I breastfeed in public I try to be discreet. Using covers and the such when needed but there is a part of me that really prays that no one says anything. I don't want to fight. I'll be super passive-aggressive but I'm not one to look for fights, I usually run and usually fold just to avoid confrontation. I like to talk about other peoples drama but I don't want any myself. So the idea of being told to quit breastfeeding really kinda scares me.

I have to be strong for my daughter. Breast is best. Breast is normal. So why do I feel the need to have Ray with me? Why do I think that I'm more powerful with my man? It wasn't til I thought it, "they wouldn't any say anything if her man were there" that I realized just how weak I am or at least how weak I feel. I know there is power in numbers. The more people who seem to accept something then the more likely other will accept it too. But should women feel like breastfeeding is a strange thing? What is there to accept? Breastfeeding is normal. People don't harass mothers that are bottle feeding. Do I really need a man to protect me while I feed my baby? As you can see this just brought up some weird thoughts and issues for me. Maybe I do need man, does that make me less of a woman?

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Censorship

I did a bad thing. I censored speech. I've censored comments on my Facebook and even on my blog. I try to be open to whatever someone has to say to me but screw them, it's my blog and Facebook, I decide.

With that said, I'm a librarian by trade so censorship is a touchy issue for me. I want people to express themselves. Good, bad, ugly, everyone has the right to express their thoughts. But in a school, I have to censor. I can't let kids call each other "bad" names and I hate to hear them refer to each other as the "F" word. Where does censorship end?

I censor myself alot. I think many things but express few. Sometimes is about other people (good thing to keep to oneself), sometimes its about myself (might should express those so I can change) and sometimes its just conversation I don't dare have (mostly with DH). I try to own whatever I say. I hate it when people hide behind their words. I think blogs are a really good place for it. You can just get on, write what you please, and hide. I try not to hide but I'm sure that I do. Hiding is just so easy these days.

I read lots of "mommy" site and "anti-mommy" sites. I try to keep an open mind when it comes to raising Audrey. She's my first child so I know nothing. I more or less parent on instinct. I didn't really decide to co-sleep, it just happened. There are some hateful anti-homebirth site out there. It's scary to me the hate you can find. People are passionate. I guess it's good that people believe so strongly in things. I've heard it said that there is alot of apathy in the world but I think kids tend to bring out the passion in people.

I'm crunchy but I try to understand creamies too. I know that a homebirth isn't for everyone. Sometimes breastfeeding doesn't work out. Co-sleeping in the wrong situation can be deadly. So I try to be open and understand that other people are different from me. I try not to attack others for what they do or think since I don't want others to do it to me. But it is hard to be nice all the time. Sometimes people just suck. Sometimes I can't help but to think that a person shouldn't have child while other people who would be great parents don't have any children at all.

It's hard to censor. I want to support everyone even the people I don't believe in. But it is so much easier said than done.