Wednesday, June 30, 2010

many thoughts, no pictures

Wednesdays are usually wordless but not so today.  Not sure if I've blogged about this but today is moving day.  After 7 years of living in Virginia, we are moving back to Texas. 

It feels bittersweet to leave.  I feel like we've finally hit our stride.  We have friends, a house, two dogs, a baby but we don't have family here.  I don't want Audrey to grow up without her family.  I always felt cheated to only see my grandparents twice a year (well my mother's parents, my dad's parents were in town).  I want Audrey to have family around.  Between both sides of the family she has 8 cousins!  She deserves to grow up with them around. 

I love my life in Virginia but I'm ready to move on.  I never expected to live in Danville for 7 years.  I always expected to move to the big city, Roanoke or Greensboro.  I guess I always had one foot out the door with Danville.  But of course once I decided to leave, God put some incredible people in my life.  It's harder to leave than I thought and I'm trying to not feel the feelings or I"m afraid I'll totally breakdown and refuse to leave.  I know we've made the right decision but it is hard to go into the unknown. 

Lufkin is my hometown but like Thomas Wolf wrote, "You can't go home again."  Lufkin is a different place and I'm a different person.  I hope we get along.  I hope I find some local friends.  I have my bestest friends in Texas but they will be about 4 hours away.  I hope I find some crunchy mammas to hang with so that I don't feel like a freak.  I hope that I can learn to let go and let God take my life in the direction that is right for me.  Being a parent means making decisions that are best for someone besides yourself.  I know I'm doing the right thing and I'm at peace with it but it's still hard. 

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Monday, June 21, 2010

First time solids

So Friday we gave Audrey solids for the first time.  We gave her bananas, well a banana.  Since we are doing baby-led weaning, I knew that this first time would be more about play than actual eating.  I wasn't worried about her filling up on banana or trying to get her to eat half or anything like that.  I just cut it up into strips and let her have at it.

Just like we expected she didn't eat very much.  She did seem to have lots of fun touching it and smashing it.  She was covered in banana!  She seemed very hesitant to put it in her mouth, which surprised me.  I mean the child had been putting everything in her mouth as soon as possible and now that I wanted her to put it in her mouth she was acting shy!  But I had to remind myself that it was about her needs and if touching was as far as she wanted to go that was ok.  She did eventually put some of it in her mouth.  I don't think banana is her favorite food but we'll see.  By the end she was a bit more willing to put it in her mouth.  I don't think very much was actually consumed but it was fun.  Guess what wordless Wednesday will be!

So we are jumping into solids now.  We've let her try carrots.  Again not much was eaten but when she spit it out the dogs jumped to the rescue and ate it.  So kind of them to clean up after Audrey!  I have noticed that she is much more into her booby time.  She seems happier and hungrier.  She latches right on and gets to work.  She is eating less frequently but where she was only eating out of one boob, she is not finishing both off.  I guess the world is just a little to interesting to be snacking all day.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Wordless Wednesday - First time in Texas

Audrey as we cross into Texas!

Audrey as we cross into Angelina County!

Babywearing at the Mississippi rest area (this is actually before the previous 2)

Just some pics from the recent trip "home" to Texas.

Monday, June 14, 2010

Baby-led weaning

So Audrey is almost 6-month-old.  Only a few days left of EBF (Exclusive Breast Feeding).  On the 17th, we plan to introduce solids.  I'm not sure how I feel about this new stage of her life.  Up until now all 17 lbs of Audrey have come from me.  Every little roll, chunky toe, and double chin have come from me. 

I'm not sure I'm ready to share her with others.  I have taken her meal times as mommy and me time.  We talk and I get her all to myself.  But I know it's time.  To be honest, it's been time.  She's shown interest in "real food" at like 5 months but I wanted to hit the 6-months of EBF mark.  With all of the food allergies that DH has I wanted to give her the best chance at living allergy-free.  I hope the EBF helps. 

We are doing baby-led weaning so no baby-food.  We will start with some cut up banana.  I'll post pictures.  I also plan to video.  It is a new phase and here we go.

Friday, June 4, 2010

EC - 2nd week

Okay so first I owe DH an apology.  In my last EC posting I made him sound very unsupportive of the whole EC thing but this week he has actually been trying it!  Tuesday, I got Audrey to poop in her new Baby Bjorn potty!  Then later that day, DH put her on the potty again and she peed!  We are still just occasional ECers but at least we are trying.  We aren't pushing her just giving her a chance.  If I put her on the potty and nothing happens, it's cool.  It's not about training her, it's about learning how to communicate with her.  When does she go potty?  What are her signs?  Not sure just how far we are going to take it.  I think the occasional potty trip is plenty here.  I think anytime we save a diaper we are doing well.

We are also starting to cloth diaper.  Again nothing big just the occasional cloth diaper here and there.  I'm beginning to build a stash.  I have 6 GoodMamas and 3 TotBots but only one wool skirty :( We are also in the middle of moving and still don't have a washer so we are nowhere ready for full-time cloth.  But I'm hoping with a little more stash building that I'll be able to save the disposibles for the rare occasion rather than the everyday.  We'll see.  Back to packing  . . .

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Even after 5 months I'm still a Breastfeeding Newbie

So the other day I noticed that my afternoon pumping session was yielding a lot less milk, like down almost 2 oz.  I freaked out.  My baby!  She's going to starve!  I starting thinking what could be going on!  I emailed my Breastfeeding mentor but she's out of town so it could be a bit before I get a reply.

So I kept thinking, what is different?  What did I do before that I'm not doing now?  I think I've got it.  I stopped eating my mid-morning snack!  Ever since I was pregnant I had to get in the habit of eating breakfast and a mid-morning snack.  I"m usually on of those eat lunch and huge dinner people but that wasn't going to work for Audrey inutero or out in the real world.  I have to eat.  Maybe all the smaller meals is why I've lost 20 lbs on top of my "baby" weight, but anyways.

Yesterday I made sure to eat a mid-morning snack and guess what, I pumped back at my usual total.  I guess it's not just how many calories I eat but also when I eat them.  Most mornings I am hungry for breakfast, so that habit is easy but I'm usually not so hungry for a mid-morning snack.  That is going to take a little bit of effort on my part but in the end Audrey is worth it and if I get a smaller waistline too that isn't a bad thing.  So despite all of my knowledge, I still feel like a breastfeeding newbie.  I bet that is why groups like La Leche League exists.  Sometimes we need a little help even after the 6-week postpartum check.

Moral of the story: If you need help then ask for it.  While breastfeeding is natural, it doesn't always come naturally.  Never be afraid to ask for help and to ask questions.  No one knows it all and people are always willing to help if they know you need it.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Wordless Wednesday - EC Action

Sorry for the crappy pic, took it with the MacBook webcam.  For the record she is 5-months-old and on a Baby Bjorn Smart Potty.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Babies, Boobies, Mei Tais, Ring Slings and Wraps - OH MY!

So on Saturday, I had the privilege of attending the first meeting of the Triad Tot Toters.  I had a blast.  This was actually the third meeting for the group but the first as an official group.  So what is TTT?  It's a group of people, men and women, that wear their babies.  It is nice to meet up with a group of people who share my philosophy of baby raising.  Not everyone in the group believes in raising their children the same but we all agree that babywearing is where it's at!

One of the nice things about the group is that you can find someone that shares your issues, concerns, and or beliefs.  Many of us breastfeed and luckily being in a group makes me brave enough to just pull my boob out and feed Audrey in public.  Some cloth diaper and since I'm interested in moving to cloth, it gives me the chance to ask questions.  A couple EC so again I pick some brains.  One of the ladies even used the same midwife as me!  I love the Triad Tot Toters.  They give me support in all facets of child rearing not just babywearing.

I hate that now that I have 'mommy' friends I'm going to be moving.  Where will I ever find a group like this again.  I've already looked.  There is no such group in Lufkin.  The closest is a group in Houston, but I'm not sure I want to drive over 90 mins.  We'll see how it goes.  I know that I will miss them when I move.  I'll be able to keep up with them via Facebook and the webpage but I won't be able to see them in person and watch the babies grow.