Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Girl power

So as of late I have been thinking a lot about why I decided to play bass. I mean not like I've grown up with super women bassist. Outside of the Go-Gos and the Bangles, are there any women bassist on stage? I found a list of top 100 rock bass players and there are like 3 women on it, see for yourself.

So why the bass? The answer is pretty simple, I met a female bassist and she kicks ass. She goes by Medusa and plays for the the Rusty Shacklefords. I've had the chance to see them perform several times and each time is she kicks ass. Sometimes she's totally glam and others low key but always kick ass. I want to do that. I want that confidence. I want my daughter to see me do that. I also go to see No Love Less, they too have a kick ass woman on the bass. I want to be the kick ass woman on the bass.

Anyways back to Ravebaby. She as of late wants to play bass. She says, "I play bass!" And will run to grab her plastic guitar. It is not weird to her. Chicks on guitar is nothing new but it seems the bass and drums are the final frontier. I want my daughter to be anything she wants. I want her to not stop and think about it but just know she can be it. I know the bass is a small thing but every stereotype that she sees busted is another one that doesn't keep her from reaching for the stars. Be president, be a doctor, be the best drummer ever, be the best rock bassist ever just never let the idea that it's not what girls do stop you!

Ravebaby on stage with The Rusty Shacklefords. She is copying Medusa's rocker stance!

Wordless Wednesday: sit down Uncle Max!

Sunday, November 25, 2012

Dark side of the moon or in this case momma

SoDH hang with an interesting group of people. It started with a coffeeshop and a high school connection and now is a group of friends I look forward to seeing. As part of this little group we usually have weekly topics during which we discuss everything from politics, to sex, to Jesus and his love. These are lots of fun and while as a group looks as different as possible, we share some similar views.

I missed this weeks talk, after Thanksgiving I was just too exhausted. DH told me that the topic was group dynamics. One of the things about this group is we just came together. No written rules just implied trust. As part of the trust is an understanding that we all still have our dark sides and that as needed we open up and close up.

Everyone has a dark side. Everyone has this things/events that they keep in the dark corners of their mind. This group is far from dark. Actually it seems we all are working hard to live for today and to just be happy. We also understand that our dark sides are part of us. Not that we celebrate those sides but we know we are these wonderful people because we have all survived something, someone, some event.

Are my secrets safe with these people? Only time will tell. How much of me will I honestly show? Hard to say. We all have dark corners. We all need to have people around us that understand that they don't need to know those corners just accept us for everything we are and don't require anything but openness.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Do your bones remember?

I asked DH on Wednesday if he thought "our bones remember?". Why the question? Wednesday made 26 years since my grandfather, Matilde, passed away. Most years it goes by without coming to the fore front of my mind. This year, since I am working at the church and I can request masses to be said, I looked up his death date and requested a mass. However, this year like the last 25 before it, my father couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, was more withdrawn, was all but silent. This happens every year. He doesn't say it. I don't think he goes through it consciously. it seems to me to be in his bones. His spirit knows and his spirit mourns the loss of his dad.

In high school DH and I had this fantastic biology teacher who was missing a couple of finger tips. I remember him talking about how those tips would itch. It was the worse itch ever because it was the only one he would never be able to scratch. Even after 20+ years his body remembered those finger tips and still felt them.

Maybe we all do that. Maybe those days are bad days not because of what is going on right now but because of something our bones remember. It's not something in our fore-mind. We don't think about it. We feel it. We feel it deep inside.

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Seeing through me

So DH had a heart to heart with his bro and these conversations always lead to discussing their wives. I hate that he talks about me to other people but I especially hate that he seems to share everything with this particular bro. This led to a discussion between us as to why it bothers me.

According to DH, my problem is that I and this bro are very similar. Similar in that we both see thru people but seem to be unable to read each other. Well this conclusion confuses me. I see through people? I don't read people. I never know people. DH is the best judge of character ever! Me, I just approach everyone as a friend unless I get a funny vibe or immediate dislike, which doesn't happen often.

I asked DH to clarify. I see through people? He said that I just seem to know what people need to hear. That I can look at someone and despite what they say I know what they need to hear. Really?! I'm not buying it. I honestly feel like I live my life on the self-absorbed side and never seem to pay enough attention to the world around me.

I am still confused by DH's conclusion. I guess part of my confusion is my dislike for the concept of seeing through people. I guess it makes me feel like he is saying I am always looking for a way to work people over. I think it feels like he is saying I'm a user. Am I a user? Do I only see people for what they can do for me? I don't feel like I do. I don't think that DH is saying that but that is what it feels like.

Who knows why people butt heads or don't seem jive. I'm going to try not to over analyze this but considering that he told all of this on Wed and now it's Sunday the over-analyzing ship has sailed. I see through people?