More Boob! (Warning: Picture included)

I feel like I need to change my name to More Boob.  That seems to be Ravebaby's number one thing to say.  She has a pretty big vocabulary but when it comes to me, she says More Boob.  Sometimes she sings it to the tune of Shave and a haircut.  Most time its just a demand, More Boob!

There are times that I think I want to wean her.  I do tell her no.  I don't really want to wean her.  I want her to finish nursing when she is done with nursing but there are days when I'm touched out.  I want her to leave me alone.  I want to keep my bra in its place for longer than an hour.  I don't want to nurse her at 6 am and 9 am and on and on. 

Most days are not that bad.  She's busy and barely remembers to nurse.  Most evenings are okay too.  It's just when I have a supply dip that she seems to be on me all day.  This last week has been hard.  My period started unexpected on Saturday.  I guess I should have see it coming since Ravebaby had been in my lap all week.  Seriously, this kid just knows. 

I just tend to get touched out.  I love DD and nursing her is a great way to stay connected.  But when she's on me like white on rice, I just want to explode.  There really are days that she seem to forget to nurse at all.  She might nurse at lunch and then at bedtime.  That is part of the problem, I get use to not nursing.  When she gets into nurse all the time mode, it's a hard transition for me. 

We won't wean yet.  Even if she just nurses a couple of times a day, they are sessions that keep us connected and ultimately when she does wean I'll wish I had those times back.  God willing my daughter will live to be 100 and in the grand scheme of things, 2+ years of nursing will be a tiny speck of time.

 I've even started to let her nurse in public again.  I keep going back to nursing in public because so many people seem to be against it.  If you read Twitter, so many people get brave and diss us nursing mommas.  Really most people are too chicken-shit to say anything to you in public.  Really, I don't use a cover, I'm nursing a 2 year old and never ever have I had anyone say anything.  I guess I feel like I have to put my money where my mouth is.  If I want to be an advocate then I have to walk to the walk or in my case nurse the baby.  I mean people are really scared to nurse in public.  They are afraid someone will say something to them but if they see someone else doing it then they tend to feel more comfortable.  Really, the public in general would rather you nurse your baby than hear your baby scream and cry.  It's just a little boob.  We all have nipples.  There are men with huge man-boobs that walk around shirtless all the time so why should I care if you get a view of some boob.  My boobs are pretty fab.  At least DD thinks so :)

Running off the weekend

On Saturday, DH, Audrey (Ravebaby) and I went to This Won't Suck '12 in Shreveport, LA.  We caught a ride on the Social Bliss Will of Fire van.  It was fun!  We know Social Bliss from their local jigs and in fact Max, the lead singer, is DH's guitar teacher and DD just loves him.  We caught the van at 3 pm and I got into my bed at 3 am.  It was a long day.  Ravebaby did wonderfully!  Honestly she was better than some of the "adults." :)

Before going on the van, I had the unpleasant discovery of my period starting.  I knew something was going on with me.  I had had no energy all week.  I told DH on Friday that I was worried that my hormones were just off.  Sure enough, my period started 2 weeks early.  I had thought it was time for a pregnancy test but Saturday's discovery proved that would not be necessary.  I'm sad about it.  I want another baby but I have to trust that God knows best and just deal.

As part of dealing I send Sunday in bed.  I was cramping so badly.  I hadn't hurt like that in ages.  I missed church on Easter.  I was just in too much pain.  On the upside, my energy is back.

Today I ran my Week 7 Day 1 of Couch-to-5k.  It felt so good to run.  Just run and think.  Think it out and keep running.  This week has 3 25-min runs.  It felt good to run.  I didn't run very fast but unlike my last run with stomach cramps, this was easy and I kept a steady pace.  My hip isn't hurting anymore.  I'm stretching.  I'm adding planks, sit-ups and push-ups.  Not too many just a couple to start building up my upper body.  So I ran off the weekend.

Here is Social Bliss from Saturday's jig.  You can actually see Ravebaby on stage dancing with Girlilla and the Tutu crew. 

25 min run

So yesterday I completed Week 6 Day 3 of Couch-to-5K.  It was a 25 min run.  My first 25 min run in years!  It hurt.  I kept getting stomach aches during the run.  Every time I would feel my stomach crap I would push myself harder.  I was not going to quit!  Once I slowed down to my cool-down, I had to hurry to the bathroom, just barely made it.  Maybe pushing was not the best idea but I did it!  I ran my 25 minutes.  From here on out the C25k runs are all long runs.  Week 7 is 3 25-min runs.  If I did it once with my stomach hurting then I'll kick ass this next week. 

I've actually been looking for a 5k to run before my next birthday.  I've been dreaming of actually doing some races and eventually moving up a 10k and one day a marathon.  I've always wanted to run a marathon but with my ass on the couch for the last 15 years, the idea was just that an idea.  I'm looking forward to the push.  I'm discovering just how strong I really am.  I'm discovering that it's not about the scale or the dress size, it's about getting off your ass.  I'm never going to win the Boston marathon but maybe I'll actually run some day.

Yesterday's power music was Wait Wait Don't tell me from NPR.  I'm loving listening to Wait, wait.  I'm thinking of trying an audio book next.  You can download free podcasts from Wait, wait's webpage.  If you haven't listened to an episode, do it!  I love Wait Wait!