Seeing through me

So DH had a heart to heart with his bro and these conversations always lead to discussing their wives. I hate that he talks about me to other people but I especially hate that he seems to share everything with this particular bro. This led to a discussion between us as to why it bothers me.

According to DH, my problem is that I and this bro are very similar. Similar in that we both see thru people but seem to be unable to read each other. Well this conclusion confuses me. I see through people? I don't read people. I never know people. DH is the best judge of character ever! Me, I just approach everyone as a friend unless I get a funny vibe or immediate dislike, which doesn't happen often.

I asked DH to clarify. I see through people? He said that I just seem to know what people need to hear. That I can look at someone and despite what they say I know what they need to hear. Really?! I'm not buying it. I honestly feel like I live my life on the self-absorbed side and never seem to pay enough attention to the world around me.

I am still confused by DH's conclusion. I guess part of my confusion is my dislike for the concept of seeing through people. I guess it makes me feel like he is saying I am always looking for a way to work people over. I think it feels like he is saying I'm a user. Am I a user? Do I only see people for what they can do for me? I don't feel like I do. I don't think that DH is saying that but that is what it feels like.

Who knows why people butt heads or don't seem jive. I'm going to try not to over analyze this but considering that he told all of this on Wed and now it's Sunday the over-analyzing ship has sailed. I see through people?

Wordless Wednesday: Zombie Walk

Defining Family

Last week I had pick up my nephew, well maybe I should say DH's nephew. So that in itself is the whole point of this post. I don't think in terms of his and mine. DH has 3 nieces and one nephew. I have 3 nieces and a nephew. We have been together for 17 years and none of the nieces or nephews were around til after we had been together so they have all always had the both of us. We don't think about them as belonging more to one of us. They are are family. That is how we see it.

So back to picking up my nephew, Ravebaby and Spongebob are both in the same gymnastics class and they love being in the same class. As part of getting them in the same class, I agreed to pick up Spongebob as needed. Last week was the first time I had to pick him up from school instead from my mother-in-laws house. I figured I would have to show ID. I figured I would have to be on his pickup list. My SIL did not have me on her list so they made a huge fuss about calling her and copying my ID. I didn't really think too much about it until I talked to my SIL later. They had never done that before. Never had they questioned a person picking up her child. Then my SIL reminded me why they questioned me, I am not black.

Funny how I had forgotten that. Funny that to me the family connection is obvious. I had Ravebaby with me. I had a half-black kid with me and my last name is the same as Spongebob but I'm not black so how can it really be okay for me to pick him up? I totally forgot.

People want things to work they way they think they should work. Black with black, white with white, Mexican with Mexican or at least Latin of some sort. It's not that they view it as bad just not their everyday. Maybe they talked about me and my family after we left, "Spongebob's aunt it Mexican, ewww.". I don't know. I don't care. He is my nephew and your suspicious mind is going to make us late for gymnastics, let's go lady!

I guess DH would have the same trouble if he had to pick up one of "my" nieces or nephew. I know people want a designation. They want a box to check. People want to know am I talking about the black ones or the Mexican ones. Sorry, we are just a family. Assume what you will just remember that assuming makes an ass out of you and me.