Slut, Ho, Tramp and other words I'm not sure I'm using correctly

Okay so last night DH and I had a conversation about words used to describe a woman's sexuality/sexual activity.  As a first-generation Mexican American I feel like I have missed out on some on the subtleties of the English language.  In an effort to help the rest of my fellow ESL folks here is the proper usage of terms of female sexuality, according to DH and life in deep East Texas:

(ranked in no particular order, mustly just alphabetic since I am a librarian)

Bitch - This word is more about attitude than sex.  To be stubborn or contrary or in general not doing what a man wants you to do

Heifer - This is a regional word used to mean a woman that is very large or bitchy. 

Ho - This is a shorten form of Whore and this is a very bad thing.  To be a HO one must not only be promiscuous but also stupid or dimwitted.

Hooker - Another term for a prostitute but not as bad a term as whore

Promiscuous - to have many sexual partners in a short amount of time.  This person might not be promiscuous all of the time and the total sexual number of partners over her life time might actually be small. 

Prostitute - One who takes money in exchange for sex
 
Slut - this is a positive term used to describe a woman who is comfortable in her sexuality
           This is why slut-shaming is bad.  Everyone should be comfortable in their sexuality and own it and no  one had the right to make you feel bad about knowing who you are.
              A slut is not necessarily promiscuous.  Someone who is promiscuous is not necessarily a slut.  However, you can be both at the same time.  That is like a geometry proof!

Tramp - this word has fallen out of fashion and is now commonly used to describe a tattoo above a woman's butt crack.  To be a tramp a woman must be a submissive person who is easily lead.  This woman may be monogamous or promiscuous, either way this is a state imposed on her.  Often she wants love and affection but is given sex instead.


Whore - this is a derogatory word for a prostitute. 

This is not a comprehensive list just a start and a start in conversation.  What do we mean when we use one of these words?  Context changes the means of words and thankfully context will usually tell you what the word means but if you are an ESL kid like me context doesn't give you everything.

I hope you find this list helpful and please feel free to add.  This is just a list as I currently understand it.  I mean I thought a hood-rat was an actually species of rodent so I could totally have one of these wrong.

Mamavation Mom Application

So I decided to apply to be the next Mamavation Mom!  I'm so excited about the possibility to detox my house and lose weight.  Actually I'm not so concerned about the weight thing.  It has been a while since I blogged mostly thanks to the whole working on a doctorate thing but back in September I started working toward running a 10K!  The 10K is next week and I'm ready but this leads to the whole weight thing since I have not lost a single pound!  At least I didn't gain!

Anyways back to Mamavation.  I love the whole group of Mamavation Moms.  They are a super supportive group and I'm excited about getting back into the Mamavation swing of things.  My schooling has pushed everything not school and family to the back burner but I'm ready to get back to normal and enjoy some social media time again.

If you are so inclined, I highly encourge you to join Mamavation.  Seriously a more supportive sistahood does not exists online.  Here is the link for more information on becoming a Mamavation Mom:

http://www.mamavation.com/2013/12/apply-for-mamavation-detox-weight-loss-boot-camp-january-campaign.html

So join up!

Oh and here is my application video.  Enjoy!

Learning that I am worthy

So my struggle to feel worthy of love, respect, anything, is nothing new to anyone who has read my blog with any frequency. In the last few weeks I have found a new avenue for trying to feel worthy. It happened quite by accident and I have TV to blame for it.

The story as follows:
I woke up early one Sunday morning about fours weeks ago and discovered both DD and DH were still asleep. Sunday is my sleep in day so DD usually wakes me up. I was annoyed to be up early on a Sunday but grateful for the "me" time. I've become a fan of the Travel Channel as of late and I turned to find a show I had seen several times before. I don't really like rewatching shows and I settled in for some channel surfing. Why I turned to OWN first I have no clue but I'm glad I did.

On the screen was Oprah speaking to Dr. Brene Brown. The familiar Texas accent kept me from changing the channel immediately. As I watched I began hear real words of wisdom. It wasn't someone who was enlightened and above me trying to tell me about how I should live my life but a down to earth struggling human just like me.

Now I don't do self help books or follow gurus but after Brene's Super Soul Sunday appearance, I have to admit I'm hooked. If you are not familiar with Brene's work, I highly recommend looking up her TED talk. (Actually I linked it at the bottom of this post.). She is a shame researcher. Normally that would have made me run but on that day I listened. Hearing the universal nature of shame and how to move past it so as to learn to feel worthy just spoke to my soul. I checked out Brene's book, Daring Greatly, from the library and devoured it. I am read pretty slowly and between doctoral work assignment all I really want to do is hang with my family but I just could not put the book down.

Who doesn't want to feel worthy? Who doesn't deal with shame on some level? Who would not want to do everything in their power to make sure their child never questions their own worth? So I read. I've seen Brene's TED talks and OWN appearances and I just bought her book The Gifts of Imperfection. I am moving forward to feeling and living like I am worthy and I am enough because I am worthy and I am enough. What I really like about Brene Brown is that she admits she struggles with all of the worthy and shame issues too. As I move forward I know that at the least I know one other person is also struggling on this path, of course Brene's point is we are not alone.

Anyways, at this point I have DH and most of the coffee crew reading Daring Greatly. We are doing a pseudo-reading group. It is amazing feeling like I can talk about shameful things and know that I was never alone in dealing with those things, I was just afraid to be judged for those things.

I highly recommend you look up Dr. Brene Brown. At this point in my life, Brene Brown was the voice I needed to hear. I am vulnerable and my shame in feeling vulnerable has been holding me from really living my life. As part of my doctoral program, we are working towards critical self-reflection. Do you know how vulnerable and naked it feels when talking about your grammar mistakes in front of a group of doctoral students? Or being the ex-teacher who thinks public education is bullshit in a room full of current teachers and principals? It is not a good feeling but I am surviving and I think I am learning that standing out and up for what I believe is actually a good thing. I have no reason to hide me because it am worthy of respect and of my feelings and if I can stand up and dare greatly in sharing my opinions then I might just open another persons eyes to the wonders of unschooling. I know I am totally losing my point with my rambling.

So to conclude go and read some Brene Brown.