Sunday, February 27, 2011

I'm jealous

Okay so yesterday I was in the grocery store and I randomly looked at a women's cart and I felt a stab of jealousy. Her cart was full of processed foods. I was jealous because next to her was her son. She was a mom and her cart was full of Mac and cheese, oreos, and bunches of other crap.

Yes i was jealous. Not of the "foods" she had but of the carefree nature of the cart. That mom did not think she just dumped. Her concern, can i afford is? Will we eat this? Not will this hurt my child. I don't mean to sound hateful but yes for a minute I was green with jealousy.

I never pictured my life with food allergies. When DH's food allergy test came back with wheat and yeast (among other things), I was upset. It meant a change in our diet. We tried to go totally wheat free but 8 years ago the wheat free food was hard to find and it was mostly horrible. So DH just dealt with the pain. As a grown man he can choose to eat what he wants so our diet didn't change as much as it should of. Basically we would go wheat free when his allergies were just too much.

So it was part of our lives but not the focus. I totally never thought my children would have to deal with allergies. I mean DH was 25 before his allergies were 'discovered.'. So when Audrey was screaming in pain nightly at 3 weeks old, I discovered a new phase in my life, the wheatless phase.

As long as I am breastfeeding I am wheat-free. That might be two years maybe four tops depending on when Audrey totally weans but I'll be a concerned label reading mama for the rest of my life. I'll always have to ask what is in that before Audrey eats it. I won't have that carefree grocery cart, I don't think i'll ever have that carefree cart. So yes I was jealous. I love Audrey and DH and that means I'll always have a semi-wheat-free life. But if my choices are bread and Oreos or Audrey and DH then I'll never eat and oreo again.

4 comments:

  1. I know where you're coming from and is totally fine to feel that way.. everytime I see something gluten-free I think of you and Audrey 'cause I know that must be really hard, but remember that you know what an oreo is, and she doesn't, so whenever she crosses one, she won't feel the urge to eat it like you do.. I found this bakery that sells gluten free bread, tortillas and all kinds of goodies.. they have a section where you can check the stores that sell their products.. I hope it helps..

    http://www.rudisbakery.com/

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  2. I know DH says the same thing. He just reminds me that we are eating healthy and she can't miss what she's never had. I know I just need to set my head right. She won't miss out unless I tell her she is missing out.

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  3. I know this is not what you mean but the granery sells the kinnikinnick "Ktoos" which look like oreos but taste better.

    I would love to just go and get a couple of $5 pizzas from Little Caesars on those nights that things are running crazy and I don't have dinner in the crockpot. I miss the flavor of wheat. I don't care as much about the gluten properties, I am learning to work around them, but I miss the flavor.

    The other side of it is that precious little Audrey will have a much wider palate (as in food she is willing to eat) because the majority of her meals won't be mac&cheese, pizza and hamburgers. I remember reading then mine were little that the foods you feed them when they are young is what they will want as they get older. I made my kids babyfood and when I tried to feed them the jarred stuff they wouldn't eat it.

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  4. I know. I don't mean to whine. We are doing well with the wheat-free life. It is getting easier with finding more wheat-free people like you Christy. It helps to not feel alone.
    I"m glad being wheatfree is becoming more mainstream. I think by the time Audrey is grown, being wheat-free/gluten-free will just be a normal option kinda like being vegaterian is now.

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