Sunday, July 31, 2011

Happy World Breastfeeding Week!

Just wanted to share a little song with you.  One of my favorites when it comes to promoting breastfeeding.  So in honor of World Breastfeeding Week:

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Bittersweet Birthday

Today is Baby J's first birthday, which means it's Brianna's one year death anniversery.  As DH said, it's a bittersweet day.  When I realized what today was I had to hold back tears.  DH also pointed out how many almost bittersweet birthdays there are in our families.  He almost had a bittersweet birthday; his nephew and my brothers' too. 

I know prior to Audrey's birth, DH's father was very worried about my survival of a homebirth.  Both of his parent's mother's died in or right after childbirth.  Childbirth is natural and death is natural but that doesn't mean we don't worry. 

Today I say a prayer for all of the people with bittersweet birthdays.  Today I also plan to give my Audrey extra hugs and kisses.  I want to live to give thanks to God for Audrey and for the opportunity to raise her.  Instead of getting mad that she won't go to sleep or that she knocked my glasses off my face, I'll smile and thank God.  I know not all of us get the chance to complain about sleeplessness.  So here's to you Brianna.  With your life you taught me to be kind to the least of God's children and with your death you taught me to be grateful for each day.  Happy Birthday Baby J.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Thrush Again!

So you know I'm passionate about breastfeeding.  Part of the reason so many mom's give up on breastfeeding is the lack of help when it comes to dealing with problems.  The problem that almost sunk my breastfeeding was THRUSH!  I hate thrush.

I first got thrush when I had been breastfeeding about 3 weeks.  I leaked and still leak like a loose faucet and I decided to save money by buying cheap thin nursing pads.  So cheap that they trapped the milk next to my skin and I developed a yeast infection on my boobs, thrush.  Yes, it's just like a yeast infection in your vajayjay and it is treated about the same.

My problem was that I didn't get help as soon as I had a problem.  I thought it was my latch.  I thought it was not nursing enough.  I didn't ask for help.  By the time I got help I was literally on my knees at night crying for hours the pain was so bad.  One time Audrey tried to latch and I screamed and then she screamed and we both cried for an hour.  It was bad.

I ended up going to my gyn/ob for an RX for diflucan (sp?).  I had to go through two rounds!  I also used Grapefruit Seed Extract and coconut oil.  It was a good month before it was totally gone.  Don't wait!  If you think you might have a problem ask for help.  Ask a friend, a local La Leach League leader, heck send me an email but don't suffer to the point of quitting, besides it hurts!

Here are some links that I found very help and that I turn to, even now going through thrush for the 4 time!

Dr. Jay Gordon: Identifying Thrush and how to use Grapefruit seed extract

KellyMom: Thrush Resources

Coconut Oil for Thrush Treatment

La Leche League - Thrush

Hope a momma with thrush finds this helpful.

Seven "Siete"

Ruby from Growing up BLACKXICAN tagged me to participate in this new Tag named Seven "Siete"
So here we go:

The rules are to share a blog post in each of the following seven categories:

#1 Most Beautiful Post

The sweetest moments

#2 Most Popular Post

Fear of Birth

#3 Most Controversial Post


#4 Most Helpful Post

Giveaways to know about

#5 A Post Whose Success Surprised Me

Cloth diapering on the cheap

#6 A Post that Didn’t Get the Attention I Felt It Deserved

When you stop fighting

#7 Post I'm Most Proud Of

Shut your pie-hole Crunchy Bitch

Now to tag 7 people: (okay so I'm tagging 7 blogs worth your time)

1. Naturalmente Mama

2. Growing up Blackxican

3.The Marci Factor

4. Party of 5 and counting

5. Blacktating - no longer a good breastfeeding site :(  now it's just porn

6. The Mahogany Way

7. Mom's Depot

Go check these blogs out.  They are awesome!

Wordless Wednesday: Dino dig

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Coming out of the closet

Okay so not really that kind of news but it kinda is.  I have officially finished all of my work towards becoming a LLL Leader!  I have my letter in the mail and then I will be official official.  It's nice to be able to say it out loud!  They ask us not to talk about ourselves as leader applicants so this is my official coming out. 
I'm excited about starting to host meetings and helping moms.  While I've always helped moms, I have more questions in my inbox about breastfeeding than anything, I hope that now that I have some training I might be more help. 
I know that I can come across as militant but really I just want to help mom's reach their personal breastfeeding goals. For me that goal is 2 years, anything past that is gravy.  I know for some moms it's 1 month.  But whatever the goal, I'm here to help.   Really that is every LLL leaders goal.  I know there are some leaders out there that confuse the situation and try to make everyone a militant AP mom but that ain't me.  I can live no one else life and they can't live mine.  What works for me, won't necessarily work for anyone else.  We all do what we can, the best we can.
So anyways, I'm here I breastfeed ask away :)

Monday, July 18, 2011

Parenting style

So DH and I were discussing the type of parents we want to be.  I know it seems a little late but everything you think you know about parenting is no where near close to what you learn about yourself and your child once you actually are a parent.  So now that we've been doing this for 19 months, what do we think?

Part of this discussion is DH constant need to monitor Audrey's health.  I don't mean just watch and keep notes but obsess.  I think having been burned by a few doctors as a child (he nearly died) and a couple of bad doctors for our Audrey, he just wants to make sure nothing passes him by.  Me, I try to be chill.  Not every fever means death or horrible disease.  The older she gets the less bad disease and the such are, right?

He did say something that scared me.  He said he wanted to be a helicopter dad!  Scary!  I understand what he means.  I want to be watchful.  I want to be careful but I need to also let go.  No calling college professors to ask about grades.  No calling the boss to ask about performance reviews.  So how do you raise an independent child but make sure they grow up fairly healthy and protected?

Not sure about this one.  The Casey Anthony trial and the little boy in New York plus way too many E! specials on young murders just makes me freak out and want to never let her out of my sight.  DH is very pro-public high school.  Me, I don't like the idea of public schools at all (9 years as a public educator ruined it for me).  We've talked about unschooling her.  As is Audrey has like 80 words down and is learning her ABCs and 1, 2, 3s just by chatting with her.  But again it's about her being safe not really education.  Is she safe at a school?  Is she safe anywhere?  If not then what does that mean for our family?  Being a parent is such a balancing act between freaking out about everything and letting go.  Much harder than I thought originally.  So what is our parenting style?  I'm going with work in progress for us all.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Finding local support

So I work with the public at my day job.  I get to meet so many cool people.  Nothing rocks my world more than meeting people that know where I'm coming from both as a wheatless person and as a crunchy momma.  I think it's really helpful to know you are not alone.  Yes, you can go online and find out that you are not alone.  But when you meet a person in real life, that lives where you live, it just makes you feel less alone.

I feel like less of a freak.  I've joked about starting a support group but at the same time I'm not joking.  I know there are other people who feel like I feel.  The person I met today was so interested in talking and sharing tips.  Tips that make my life easier, like where to eat and where to shop locally.  Maybe I will start a group.  I could do a group for the local wheatless folk and another for the crunchy/crunchy-ish parents.  Do you think anyone would show?

Monday, July 4, 2011

I am an asshole

So it's been a year since I moved to Texas.  I've tired to get over being mad at DH for the way the move went down (it was total chaos).  I've tried to let go of the sadness over things lost in the move (Audrey's birth certificate).

Since the move, three of my VA friends have become mothers.  One passed away in childbirth (B).  She is one that has made me appreciate my life more.  So why the asshole thing?  Immediately after B's death I made a promise to keep in better contact with people.  She was there one moment and gone the next.  I never got to thank her for all of the help she gave me after Audrey's birth.  She checked on me.  She cooked for me.  She made sure I wasn't so alone when I could not have felt more alone. 

An yet I'm a total asshole.  I don't call people.  I don't write.  I barely blog updates anymore.  I want to blame my job.  I want to blame DH.  I want to blame Audrey.  I'm a professional woman by day, a mother to a toddler by night and at some point it would be good to be a decent wife.  Between all of that when could I possibly have time for anything else. 

 I have two local friends that I have been dying to see.  I moved back to Texas a year ago and still haven't seen them!  I moved back to Texas a year ago and I have only been to San Marcos/San Antonio once so my friends in that area haven't been visited in almost a year.

Yep, I'm an asshole.  At some point I have to put the blame in the right place and that is squarely on my shoulders.  I finally have some vacation coming up.  I'm thinking it's time for a trip to SM/SA.  I'm going to make lunch plans with my local girls.  I'm going to finally return some phone calls.